Sunday, February 10, 2013

On the Pitfalls of Moving Away

Today I missed a baptism for a close friends' baby.  But this wasn't the first event I've had to skip because of my choice to live over 2,000 miles away.  It hurts similar to heartbreak to know that I can't be back in San Diego for these events.  Sometimes I reflect on this move and am hurt by the timing of it all: I'm 26.  Knowing we'll be here for the next 2 years or so, I realize that I'll be missing numerous baby showers, bachelorette parties, and countless other small events (birthdays, dinners, reunions) because of work obligations and/or the high cost of plane tickets.

It's ironic, isn't it?  Your mid-twenties is supposed to be the key time that you can adventure and discover yourself; the time where you can pick up and move at a moment's notice because your ties are limited.  It also turns out to be the time where these monumental life events--weddings, baby showers--also take place.  Now I feel like I'm always choosing between saving up for my wedding 2+ years away or maintaining the ties that I cherish so much.

Frankly, it's hard.  I've already missed a bachelorette party in Vegas and a bridal shower in San Diego because I had to choose between these other events and the wedding itself.  Plane tickets to California, at BEST, turn out to be something near $200+ round trip...but are more frequently in the $320-350 range (sometimes more, with bad timing).  My early childhood education salary isn't giving me a lot of leeway to spend money on plane tickets whenever I want to go home--especially since I'm trying to pay off that early purchase of the wedding dress.

Modern technology makes it easier to keep in touch with people, but sometimes videochatting with family and friends from afar makes me miss them more.  Seeing my nephew's new developmental milestones, for example, just isn't the same over videochat than in person.

How do you minimize these feelings of missing out when you're far away?

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